The Fountain of Youth

Late post today. I'm sorry. I wanted to post about something that happened last night and then somehow, late last night spilled into early this morning.

Needless to say, I'm getting a later start today. It's already past noon. Geez.

There are still certain places within my neighborhood that haven't been struck with the lighting bolt of gentrification. One of those places is the Literary Cafe. I've mentioned Andy and Linda's bar in postings on a number of occassions. Their venue boasts an interesting menu of sorts, and one of those menu items is Open Mic Poetry. This event is hosted monthly by Steve Goldberg, aka Poet Steve and Nick Traenkner.

Last night was my second visit to the open mic poetry reading. I had gone last month, and had a great time, but like Cinderella, I snuck out long before the clock struck midnight, because I had things to do the next day. Well, I had things to do today too, but I didn't get home until well past midnight.

The open mic forum gives poets the opportunity to read their work, or the work of someone else in front of their peers. After listening to Michelle Krivenek, one of the featured poets last night, I wandered outside and onto the Lit's back patio area with John Ettorre, Steve Goldberg and others. As we sat, talked and drank (of course, we're writers) we began to find ourselves surrounded by several of the twenty something poets.

It was spectacular.

One of the featured poets canceled that day, via e-mail and set Steve Goldberg into a tailspin of debauchery. His poison was Irish Whiskey with a Corona back. "Interesting choice." I thought as I nursed my vodka soda. Words to the wise: If you must cancel, don't send an impersonal, loaded with excuses e-mail message. Pick up the telephone for God's sakes. Is this deja vu? Haven't we covered this topic in another blog posting already?

In between Steve's fits of rage, I was listening to the words of these young poets. John and I started conversing with them. Quite simply, their conversation was more interesting. We were like reporters gathering information for a hot story: What do do? What are you reading? Where do work? What kind of sex do you like? (okay that was just me asking, not John). And finally, Why do you write poetry?

Youth. It's so beautiful. These young men and women are tainted just enough around the fringes, which in my opinion makes them that more fascinating. They're just slightly weathered, patina'd if you will, after a rainy season.

I suddenly felt very paternal. I was giving advice. Here, go this way. Have you tried this? Well, it doesn't have to be that way, go here. I wish I had a me around when I was their age as I struggled with trying to figure out what the hell the meaning of life is.

Okay, maybe not. Maybe they wished I would just shut the hell up. They listened to my porn writing wisdom ways though.

I'm not suggesting that these twenty-something poets don't have their shit together. They're very, very bright, well read and well informed. They beam with a passion for life, and the meaning of. I'm sure their lives will continue to grow, flourish and prosper with or without meeting me last night, but I was touched by this experience... I feel as if I drank from the fountain of youth....

Ciao
Neve

Porn Hardship

Hell. I could always use some new porn for my collection.

A few years ago, three of my girlfriends would frequent the Tits, Ass and Cock Porn Store close to our house on Wednesday evenings. Why was Wednesday so special you ask? Because on Wednesdays women shopped at a discount.

Hold the phone. Did someone say, discounted porn?

We were discount divas on hump day. It was like a porn happy hour. We'd each buy at least one video, or okay, DVD (it wasn't that long ago) and then we'd trade after a couple of weeks. We aimed to get the most bang for our buck, you know. It was actually a great set-up and I'm not sure why we stopped. Hmmm...I may have to take action and get that porn party started again.

Yeah. So what, right?

Yeah, well, so what, check this out:

"A man claiming to be a police detective tried to get an adult novelty shop to give him free X-rated videos, saying he wanted to make sure the performers weren't underage, authorities said. He made three tries within nine days last month and was turned down each time. The store manager called police after the third try. He's ambitious!

Authorities said Monday that the man showed a badge and left a business card from the Longmont police "age verification unit." Cmdr. Tim Lewis said there is no such unit.

It was inventive on his part, I'll give him that," Lewis said. The business card didn't have anyone's name on it, but the store gave officers surveillance video of the man. Police are looking for him." Good Lord. Give the man a break. He needs some porn and he's obviously broke. Maybe the porn store could offer him employment. He could get paid to watch porn. Hey...wait a minute. I want that job!

What's your porn hardship story?

Ciao

Neve

p.s. Cute porn necklace above can be yours, all yours. Select here.

New and Improved

I wrote this to my friend Dave, a computer genius in an e-mail recently after I thought about putting my head into the oven:

"My eyes are glazing over, and I think my head is going to explode from looking at so many different laptops and all their various components. SOS.

Good God...I need a Nordstrom personal shopper to handle this detail and wouldn't cha' know, I shop at Unique Thrift. Damn."

I'm considering upgrading my laptop to a sleeker, sexier, new and improved model: Think laptop on a slimfast diet that promises to help me win a Pulitzer Prize kind of laptop. The trouble is one of my favorite words is FREE. You see, I don't want to spend any money to upgrade. Yeah. I know, it's problematic.

Much to my discomfort, I finally snapped out of my daydreaming state of FREE and dove into deep end of reality; realizing I would have to pay some money for my upgrade. I started searching for laptops with my current laptop (unfaithful as it may seem). I've run up hills steeper than the set of specs I've read through trying to conquer, hell just understand what the fuck one laptop has compared to another. Damn, I need a job aid just to get through the comparison charts.

Here's the top 10 things I need my laptop to have:

1. Light weight.

2. Internet access.

3. Light weight (Oops. Already covered this one).

4. Acts as gourmet cook on the side.

5. Gives a good kuchie licking at the snap of my fingers. Just kidding. Sort of.

6. Metamorphizes into a 12" cock. Just kidding. Sort of. Okay. 8" will have to do, I suppose.

7. Acts as a Muse when needed.

8. Helps with writer's block.

9. Light weight (I'm praying for osmosis).

10. Doesn't talk back.

Is this unrealistic? Should I go turn the oven back on?

How do you write H-E-L-P in binary code?

Ciao

Neve

p.s. The cool computer keyboard piece above can be ordered via Etsy here.

Think...

it's not illegal, yet....

I saw this on a bumper sticker today. I'm not one to put stickers on my car, except for the necessary annual registeration sticker on my license plate.

But...I really liked this, because it says so much with so little. Less is more, I suppose.

I'm busy writing this week, folks. I'll pop back and share a sexy thought or momento at some point this week, I'm sure. It's too difficult for me to stay away from here for very long. Until then...

Think. It's not illegal, yet.

Ciao
Neve

p.s. The vintage retro painting above titled: "What do you think?" can be purchased here via Etsy.

I'd like to thank the Academy...

...and I'm ready for my close up Mr. Demille.... Okay. I'm getting way ahead of myself here, but I do have great news to share:

I wrote a short story called The Rusty Nail, and it's being published in an anthology by Oysters and Chocolate; backed by Penguin publishing. The book is scheduled to come out sometime in May, 2009.

Wait...there's more:

I've had the opportunity to get to know a very talented and well respected writer, Jeremy Edwards this year. I learned that his work is also going to be in this publication. I told him I was so happy knowing my work will be snuggled in between the pages with his work. Check out his blog and all the really cool and interesting things he's been up to this year.

A big thank you to my oldest friend and in my opinion, a literary genius, Rebecca Geiler, aka RK, my editor. She's helped me from the very beginning by editing these stories that are now coming to fruition. I deeply appreciate her support of my writing and her friendship over the last, hmmm...35 years.

I also need to mention John Ettorre in this post. John has stepped in and read my work as a literary second pair of eyes; offering his professional expertise. John Ettorre is an emmy winning writer with more than 20 years of writing experience. He's a friend that has been both encouraging and supportive of my writing career. Thank you for taking the time in your already busy and prosperous life to edit my smut related topics. ;-)


Ciao
Neve

p.s. The earrings above can be purchased via Etsy here. They're so gorgeous.

Chariots of Fire

You'd have to be living under a rock, or spending any free time you had at the museum, I suppose to not know the Summer Olympics had its pageantry on Thursday night; officially beginning Beijing 2008 on Friday, 8-08-2008.

Each and every athlete participating in these physical events regardless of what country they represent are our heroes and heroines. We will all tune in (including myself) at some point to watch as these athletes push their bodies to extremes...to view their superb physical conditioning...to cheer them on as the sweat pours off their bodies; striving to win a medal and achieve their personal best...to see their taut ripples; the flex and point of each well developed muscle...on every part of their bodies....

Whew. Damn. Is it hot in here, or what?

I have my favorite Olypic sporting events. I'm sure you do as well. I love Badminton. Among other extracurricular activities I've been involved with over the years, I played on the girl's badminton team; back in the day. I remember how cute the uniforms were; putting my cheerleading pom poms to shame. We of course played with rackets and birdies (insert shuttlecock). One of my first boyfriends, was not only a fantastic short board, surfing jock, but he also won the state championship for boys badminton. We didn't mess around when it came to our shuttlecocks, in Cali.

Enjoy watching all your favorites and of course, GO USA.

Ciao
Neve

Taking a Break

I took a break from writing yesterday. I've completed two out of three stories I've been working on and I felt I needed to touch base with the real world. You know, the civilized world outside my coffee pot, and laptop? Yeah. That world.

Anyone that has a true passion for something can relate to this: "Oh, hey, it's been awhile, but that's what a person looks like." Or,"Gee, food...wow, this is good stuff, I should eat more often." Okay, I'm embellishing. I'm certainly no H.D. Thoreau; living out in the woods; spending hours, days and years observing and writing about it: Just being. Besides, that's what Yoga is for, right?

I do interact with people: I have a job that I describe as: The Job that pay my bills and is funding my trip to Europe this year. I do get my sweat-on and head to the gym, so there is a certain amount of socialization aspects to my daily life. I have friends too. Yeah. I swear, I really do.

Then there's the caveat...

The job that pays my bills affords me the opportunity to get a lot of writing done while I'm there; which is a life I've wanted to have forever. Having a job like that equates to having little interaction with the human species. I can't complain about that specific aspect of the job while I'm typing out a novel and getting paid by the hour to do so. Capiche'?

Oh, wait, there's more...

The exhorbant cost of fuel these days has me spending more time walking and cycling the trails close to my house instead of driving to the gym and talking and socializing with human life forms. This isn't really a bad thing. I'd much rather be outside; enjoying the summer and the fresh air (oops, I forgot, I live above the industrial revolution; too late for fresh air). So...I guess I'm right back to the first line of today's message: I needed a break from writing and touch base with reality again.

So...

I went to the CMA, aka Cleveland Museum of Art. The museum has been under serious rehab and they've started to re-open certain areas in late June. It was fabulous being back; seeing some old friends. I won't get into a diatribe and give my opinion of what they've done to my museum...especially the outdoor courtyard. Gasp! Lets just say, I'll refrain from making any more comments until the project is complete in 2012. Okay, okay, okay, so you're probably right, I won't be able to shut-up about one of my all time favorite places for four years. I'm sure you'll be hearing more from again about the CMA crises.

But...until then...

I do feel as if I touched base with civilization today instead of hammering out perfect prose...and I'm ready to tackle that third story.

Ciao

Neve

p.s.The cigarette and or business card holder above can be ordered here via Etsy. I love it.