Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Hello. I'm R2D2; wanna fuck?

Maybe it has something to do with my love for erotica, and my rising, snobby, distaste for porn these days, that made me want to blog about today's topic, Robotic men and woman. I'm talking boyfriend and girlfriend robots here, people....

"She'll kiss you, dance for you and hand out your business cards — until her batteries run out. Search is buzzing with news of the release of the EMA, scheduled to debut next fall. She isn't the only robot winning search love. Adorable, animated WALL-E is clearly our robot boyfriend."

No. They don't offer a push button option for fel·la·ti·o and or cun·ni·lin·gus. I might have to take my snobby porn attitude down a notch if that were the case.

I know what you're thinking before you even utter the words, "what's the fucking difference between erotica and porn, and what the hell do you have against robots, Neve, you snobby, bitch?"

For me, porn isn't real, like the robots. Porn involves characters in film (I'm using that term loosely) that usually can't act; highlighting women with huge boobs that don't jiggle (insert: plastic) and men with cocks that look like prosethic limbs, or their cocks were possibly borrowed from an elephant at the zoo (insert: unmanagable). It just never looks real, or right; all those people fucking and faking their orgasms. Eeew.

Furthermore, who in the world writes the scripts to these porn films?

I mean come on, what dude do you know that finally manages to pull himself up from his couch potato state and open the door to what he thinks is the pimple-faced, sixteen year-old pizza delivery boy, only to find not one, not two, but three, sometime four, hot, young female co-eds standing there on his door-step? They're all dressed in scantily ripped clothes (of course) and they beg to come in and play sucky-fucky? Oh, and the pizza is free.

Not. So. Much.

Erotica is what most people feel, or want on some sublimated level; sans robotics. Erotica that is well written (it's what I strive for), pulls you into the story, because you can relate to it. A woman who gets burned in her heterosexual relationship finds love and sex in the arms of her lesbian girlfriend, like my story, Project Down Under. I know. I know. I'm plugging my stuff here, but I can do that, this is my blog, right?

Here's my porn versus erotica anolgy:
I don't watch many, if any hollywood blockbuster movies. I'm always disappointed; feeling like I could have written the script (insert snob); providing a much better, beginning, middle and ending (I've probably lost any and all chances of writing for some big named Hollywood producer now). Hollywood movies are like porn. It's a good fix every now and again, when you're bored and you'd rather not have to think about what you're watching, or fucking.

I usually sway toward the low-budget, independent films and they're usually sub-titled. The acting is suberp. The script is outstanding and believable. The direction, cinematography and overall feel of the film gives me goose-bumps. I can relate to the film; I'm engaged; captivated with the reality of the story. I have to think about it much more than the blockbuster movie; but the independent film stays with me for a long time, like a good, real orgasm.



p.s. I'm saying Ciao until I leave and come back from Italy in September. ;-)

1 comment:

Craig Sorensen said...

Hear, hear!

I couldn't agree more.